Monday, November 11, 2013

I just hope...

Today, I was able to do my daily blog reading earlier than usual.

I was surprised to see how many posts I saw about relationships, marriages, etc. It was kind of painful to read all of the posts. If I would have read them a couple of months ago, I don't think it would have been as painful and uncomfortable. But times have changed.

You see, Colon and I have been together for awhile. We started dating our freshman year of college. We lived in Gainesville and while there we had our ups and downs. But overall, we were a great couple. We are completely different but seem to balance each other out.

Throughout college, he went on several internships out of state and we did go through several bouts of long-distance.

But we survived through that. About this time last year, we were planning our move to Arizona. Colon got a job out here and we considered the move. So, we moved. It was a high in our relationship. We were so in love and everything seemed so magical.

Once out here, things seemed to be going well. But then, the magic just went away. We started to crumble and things came to a head the last few months. I was so lost. I had no idea what happened. Things just changed all of a sudden. Words were said. Things we I regret saying. I cannot say "we" because I don't know if he regrets them. He meant them. They were the truth. Whatever.

We became too complacent. Took each other for granted. Me more than him. I will take a lot of the blame.

We spent TOO much time together. Yet we didn't spend enough quality time together.

It got bad. I didn't know who to talk to. All aspects of my life became worse. Work was more stressful. I was pushing away friends and family. I didn't have anyone to talk to.

My best friend became my enemy.

That was the worst part.

I did not have the courage to blog about it. Somehow, writing about our troubles seemed like putting a stamp on my failure. I just could not do it.

But I finally decided to talk to friends. I started doing things on my own and started having fun.

Somehow, Colon and I started hanging out more. Including each other in our outings. Working out together. Eating together. Going out together. Things are slowly getting better. We have not had huge fights and have I have been feeling ten times better.

I don't know what the future holds for us. But I hope it's ten times better than the last few months that we've had. I just hope I learned from the issues we had.

I just hope...

This post hit home!
I want what she has!
XO



This post was hard to write...




6 comments:

  1. I had wondered if that was the reason you were gong through tough times. Relationships are hard and sometimes you do have to step back. I'm glad things are slowly getting better for the two of you. Sending positive thoughts your way!

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  2. I hope things continue to get better, love!

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  3. I'm so sorry to hear about your relationship. I praise you for being so brave and sharing this on your blog. Thinking of you and sending good vibes for you two, to have patience and understanding of one another!
    xo TJ

    http://www.hislittlelady.com

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  4. Complacency is a scary thing. It sounds like both of you is working to make things work, and that is so important. Keeping you both in my thoughts.

    And just so you know, it's incredibly brave to put this out there.

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  5. I hope things keep going on the up and up. Moving is hard. Especially to a place where neither of you are from and you only have each other. Email me if you ever need to chat - I'm a good listener.

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  6. I think every couple goes through these times. Relationships are tough. I hope that things continue to look up for you guys. Thanks for sharing, it takes alot to share our hearts on these blogs. <3

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