Thursday, March 31, 2011


"Whenever a taboo is broken, something good happens, something vitalizing. Taboos are after all only hangovers, the product of diseased minds, you might say, of fearsome people who hadn't the courage to live and who under the guise of morality and religion have imposed these things upon us"
~ Henry Miller

Have you ever wondered why certain words and concepts are considered taboo? I have started to notice how many things were considered taboo in my household while growing up. 

My parents were not on equal levels of openness.  My mother acted as if it never happened and was unnatural to take part in it. She was uncomfortable speaking with us about sex or anything sexual. My father was more open about it and was actually willing to talk to us. He was the one that gave my sisters and I the "sex" talk. I remember that day as if it was yesterday. I was 12; My sister was 10; and my other sister was 6. We had just pulled into the driveway and had just come from a day shopping at Dadeland mall. My sisters and I were reaching for the door handle when my father looked back at us and said that he wanted to talk with us. He had the expression that he always had when he had something important to say. That was when he started talking about sex. He basically said that sex wasn't a bad thing, but it was important to take part in it when you were ready and when you loved the person. I laugh in hindsight because I can still hear my mother's interjections and can still picture her expressions as my father was talking. 

But I digress. I tell you about my sex talk experience because I want to show you where I am coming from. Although my father said that sex was not a bad thing and that sex was nothing to be ashamed of, he ended the speech with a (warning) look and a "someone who is not married should not have sex". My mother was worse. She made sex seem as if it was dirty. It was ingrained in our heads that sex (or anything considered sexual) before marriage was dirty. I even remember her telling me that an unmarried girl who engages in any kind of sexual encounters was a slut. 

I used to be extremely uncomfortable with anything sexual. Honestly, I have come a long way, but I still need help. I still need a change. One thing I need to do is get used to verbalizing "penis" and "vagina". You may think this is weird, but I am being honest. I could not say the words out loud. Growing up, we used the Tagalog words for vagina, and penis was not even said often. Now, I can think the words, but verbalizing them is hard. When I do say them, I am either in a class setting (i.e. anatomy, physiology, etc) or I say them so fast, and so low that people have a hard time understanding what I am saying.

I want to change this!!!

Why is it so hard for me to say these words? They are just body parts. They are natural and are, in a sense, beautiful. Thus, I am currently working on saying penis and vagina.

So I end with this video and the words:





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